Regrets? I’ve had a Few.

It’s abnormal to not have any regrets; it’s abnormal to let them control our lives

A Grain of Salt | ElbyJames
3 min readMay 23, 2021


Have you ever reflected on things you should’ve done? Or maybe thought about things you shouldn’t have done? When you’re on your death bed, will you have regrets? I know I will, I have regrets now. Lewis Carroll said it best,

“In the end . . .we only regret the chances we didn’t take, the relationships we were afraid to have, and the decisions we waited too long to make.”

There are two types of regrets. The first one are the regrets you can’t change. These regrets can be over actions we’ve taken over short time periods regretting actions we’ve taken and mistakes we’ve made. Examples of this can be spending money on something we could’ve done without just a while back.

Where as over long time periods, we are more likely to regret actions not taken. These regrets could be missed opportunities for love or working too hard and not spending enough time with family.

In other words, in the short-term we regret our actions more than our inactions but in the long-term it’s the inactions which leads to greater regret.

The other regrets are the ones we can change. This isn’t so easy to do as it involves our ego at times. Have you ever been in an argument and said something you shouldn’t have? Or maybe you’ve said something which upset your spouse. Once we’ve sat and thought about it for a while we start to regret what we’ve said. This regret can be corrected by an apology.

In short, these regrets usually boil down to admitting we were wrong – either directly or indirectly.

I would argue there is a third type of regret: Regret we can prevent, or future regrets. As for me, I know myself and I can talk myself out of just about anything. I can rationalise why I should or shouldn’t do something. So, to prevent future regrets, I quit thinking about it and just do it.

I always regret to not having any money in the bank. I always wanted to save money but I’m too lazy to do it. So I go to my bank on the next business day and set up a savings account using direct…



A Grain of Salt | ElbyJames

ElbyJames is an American disabled combat vet exiled in the UK & a free speech absolutist. He’s an occasional Top Writer .